Lonely Entrepreneur Club Gifts

"I'm a sole trader..and starting to feel more solitary by the minute!"

"Well, it's unanimous. Instead of going out of business quietly, with dignity and grace, we've decided to end things killer asteroid-style, taking as many of our competitors with us as possible!"

Child using building blocks to get over a baby gate.

Jeff's Smorgasbord

ONE HORSE TOWN

"When I grow up, I'm going to be a suit."

3 cents glass - Exact change please, seller can't count.

Drinking Companions

Homework Done and Homework Eaten Stands.

'We're going to take a financial risk.'

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

"It's lonely here at the top. Thank goodness I've never been a people person."

Pat My Dog $5

"All of my friends are imaginary."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

'I'm worried about myself, Doc...I'm not spending much time with other cats.'

Table for two. Whom does sir think he's kidding? You're right table for one. Menu.

"Since no one showed up, I'll keep my remarks brief."

Snub Marine

It's time for a corporate shakeup. You squeeze, I'll stir.

'Sigh - Yes, I will probably be dying alone.'

'Since the healthcare legislation became law, our Little MBA kit outsells our Little Doctor Kit by a hundred to one.'

"I have yet to turn a profit, but I have no trouble getting funding from my parents."

'I HATE Spring cleaning!'

Hell, yes, it's lonely at the top. Plus I get nosebleeds.

'I quit the ice cream stand last year. Now I'm double dipping.'

'I'll have my people call your people. Wait a minute, that won't work. I'm a sole proprietor.'

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"I trademarked my name, so now you'll need to pay me to use it."

'This next song's for anyone who's feeling a little lonely right now.'

Smith and Son Financial Services. (Son in playpen behind desk).

'I had a very lonely childhood. I was an only twin.'

"Oh, it's just what they call it. I'm sure you can do it at night, too."

"I'm aware of that. Fortunately there are no child management laws."

"I called them to ask for a raise!"