Loneliness Enthusiast Gifts

Jobs that will make you really lonely...

'I know living on an abandoned nuclear test site has its advantages - no bugs, no snakes, no univited guests but did it ever occur to you that there's nothing else here either?'

Cellphone Islands

Crowded Ice Fishing

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

'What I've learnt sitting on this mountain, alone for ten years, is how boring sitting alone on a mountain for ten years is!'

"Well, it gets lonely up here!"

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

'Maybe we should talk to him more, Malcolm.'

"All of my friends are imaginary."

'I'm worried about myself, Doc...I'm not spending much time with other cats.'

Desert Planet

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

Man looking at a vending machine with a hand sticking out of it and a sign that reads "Put'er there buddy".

'What luck!'

"Beware of dog"

Man on park bench: I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.

Welcome to the Hothouse Writer's Colony.

"Your contact tracing revealed that you have no life."

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

Big Birthday Boy Breakfast.

"No thanks, I need time away from madness."

'I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?'

The Side Effect of Self-Awareness

'That's the point - We're SUPPOSED to be out of the loop!'

Poet beside a (literally) babbling brook.

"Not now, Elaine—I'm on my man-cloud."

'It was designed for people who don't want any visitors.'

Where's Mom?

'Will you be dining alone tonight, Sir?'

"And he hits it, and the other guy hits it back, and the first guy hits it, and the second guy hits it back and-"

"You can just leave it on that crag, thanks."

"We can't blame the travel agent, you asked for somewhere quiet and away fro it all."

'No matter where you go, people somehow find you.'

'I told you that nobody would show up.'