Local Politician Gifts

"Your heart won't tolerate any more town-hall meetings."

Limerick town council meeting.

"When I return to public office, some people had better watch out."

None of Our Business

Put It On the Room

the pLAn

Suspension isn't Punishment

Phase III of Council Harassment of Residents Scheme.

"...Ever since he was elected to the town council."

"No, I don't want to sign your petition, thank you."

Jackie Weaver

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Sign Reform

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

"Ah, you'll be wanting our red tape department, third door on the left!"

'Oh,oh, Regina has her lawyer with her.'

"It's come to my attention that our sister city has been borrowing our city's clothes without even asking."

"They're spelt differently!"

Which One is Pulling Out?

Find More Kids

'Hey, he's just some guy from the neighborhood -- and you know what Chicago neighborhoods are like!'

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

Double Rose Bowl

And the Winner Is...

One cappuccino please, and I wanted to give you this. A note. How formal. Dear small local independent coffee house ... I went to Starbucks this morning. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive me? What if I agree to purge what I ate? The written apology is sufficient.

"We find that we have to put this on all public consultation websites ..."

Small store loses out to glossy big store

Reselling for Fun and Profit

Campaign Spending

I'm declaring my candidacy. For what? Health Commissioner of Candorville, the fine nearly township from whence my clan hails. I'm going to right the ship of America. Bring it on, whiny Democrats! I miss the jungle.

Elect ME, your neighbor!