Local Politics Follower Gifts

Get Off My Sidewalk

Small and Decrepit

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Sign Reform

GOP exaggerating scale of immigration, inflation and crime rates

'Mmm...Smells like waffles!'

Palin 2012

Hide me. Under the table. What's the matter? He's coming. Who. Who??? The wolf! The hairy man. The insatiable and relentless one. Didn't we just finish an election cycle? There he is! Oh no! The 2020 elections are around the corner. Wolf Blitzer! Run! I'll tune in tomorrow. Don't eat me! CNN.

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

"Ah, you'll be wanting our red tape department, third door on the left!"

"We've been campaigning for years to encourage central government to delegate more powers to local authorities..."

"It's come to my attention that our sister city has been borrowing our city's clothes without even asking."

Which One is Pulling Out?

"They're spelt differently!"

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

"Well, you have to admire his honesty."

"Find out what the people want so I can tell it like it is."

'Obama's letting all the progress we made in Iraq go right down the drain...He's trying to distract everybody...'

"I Win!!!"

"We were thinking, since your head speechwriter understands the issues better than you do, speaks better than you do, is smarter and better-looking than you.."

"Well, I don't think we should count on much help from the Russians this election."

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

'We're saved! -- it's Superdelegate!'

Meanwhile, back at the GOP presidential candidate interviews. . .

Up-to-the-minute reporting from our man on the street.

RFK Jr Anti-Vax

Find More Kids

"It's going to be a tough four years."

"So then I thought...who needs speech writers when I can just recite all my old tweets!"

Wimp and Wimpier: The Democratic Field for 2020

"My net worth is $8.7 billion - so I can't be bought by any interest group!"

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'Folks, meet public enemy number 1!'

"The latest poll numbers must be out."