Loan Warriors Gifts

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

U of Debt

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

'Wait a minute....!

'My micro is so good it's beginning to grow into the macro.'

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

Ready for the curves life throws at you.

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

Yes we can increase your overdraft, but I'd like to see a little more grovelling, please.

'A loan, certainly, how much would you like?'

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

"Yes, we've refused your loan application."

Loans. To make a long story short, my cash flow needs some new tributaries.

"We've got borrower's remorse."

"To be honest I'd rather make love not war, but my chat-up lines are terrible."

'How much do you want?' - 'How much have you got?'

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

"Not on my watch..."

"Don't you dare apologize to me!"

'Are you kidding, you credit's better than ours.'

'Progress. Your prenup process is down to two boxes of tissue a day.'

'What do you mean you've done more for me than my mother did?'

First hurdle to getting a loan. Angry woman.

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

"O.K. final question: I'm thinking of a number between one and 100."

"We can only apologise, Mr. Kent. But wouldn't you think that a superhero's uniform would be shrink-proofed?"

'Sorry son, I spent all your inheritence fighting inheritence tax.'

Modern Monster

'Can I have a new credit card please - this one's full up!'