Little Rascal Pillows

'Hey! Who left the television off?'

"Gloves off at the table please!" "They're not gloves, they're dirt!"

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Child driving a toy car

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

'There's so much I want to do with my life...before I reach the age of criminal responsibility, that is.'

As a reformed gunfight, Big Jake vowed never again to use an iron

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

'It's an '07 model. I JUST finished putting it together.'

'I counted them as well. . .There were four too many.'

'How do people without a middle name know when the're in trouble?'

"Nine and three! Nine and three o’clock!!"

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

'You kids get out of this park right now and go play in traffic!!!'

'Ruddy european labelling legislation'

"It's new. It's called a pre-tip. You pay me now and I'll actually bring your food before it's cold!"

Microwave - 'Table 19 sends compliments to the chef!'

'Mind giving him his bath now- he'll be asleep when we get home!'

Ram Raiders deterred due to wet paint.

No child onboard. Don't drive carefully.

Man: 'Oh for HEAVEN'S sake Zachary! WHAT have I told you about RUNNING THROUGH the house?!

'I'm afraid your 'giggle-pin's' gone on your 'laugh-shaft'!'

The Tour de Pants.

'I'm afraid releasing that information would not be in the public interest.'

Boy throwing mud over a coachman's heels

"You'll never eat all that. Your problem is your eyes are bigger than your stomach."

Weather forecasters tell lies!

'How impressive! I had no idea they awarded a Nobel Prize for home winemaking.'

Devil

Throwing snails into next door's garden

For the last time, Mr. Clooney - That's not what we do here.

'I found a sure way to score at the races. Don't pick horses, pick pockets.'

"British Rail regrets the delay of......"