Literary Gossip Gifts

"Oh, that Jane. I thought you were talking about Jane Austen."

Welcome to our book group.

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

'She's so put together!'

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

A little bird told me...

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

Whodunnit. Whoreallydunnit.

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

JET (Part I)

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

"To 'click to enter' or not to 'click to enter'… that is the question."

'I wish there was some way we could reduce emissions here.'

"Boss, remember when you told me to start charging Sadie 'studio fees' for operating her radio show in the cafe?" "Well, I've got good news and bad news." "What's the good?" "She's agreed not to resort to violence." "I see. And the bad news?" "On today's 'Sadie Cohen Radio Show': Evil cafe owners who may or may not poison their customers."

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

"He's a real throwback. He does all his own publicity stunts."

"He's only an associate but he's already reaping at a partner's level."

Weditorials

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

'Botox...'

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."