Gossiping Enthusiast Gifts

'Prejudices ready? Disbelief suspended? Here comes the rumour.'

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

'She's so put together!'

A little bird told me...

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

"Whine and cheezed party."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

"True, a salary cap on Wall Street may limit the talent pool, but, on the other hand, if they get any more talented we'll all be broke."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

What happened when the bond issues failed during the building of the Great Wall of China: The Great Picket Fence of China.

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

JET (Part I)

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"I liked it better when it was 'don't ask, don't tell the New York Times'."

"I'm a common dolphin, I swim the west coast of Scotland foraging for fish and squid."

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Botox."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"You work for the family business, and I am your father, not the patriarchal oppressor..."

Weditorials

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"Cartoonist are harmless? Not at all!! These people have weapons!! Here, see for yourself!"

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

"She's got money and he's a 'poet'."

"We did our best for your husband but his poor old health insurance was too weak..."