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Hercule Parrot

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'You know bank pens never work. Why didn't you write the holdup note before we left?!'

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'It's some more story ideas from Francis Bacon.'

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

'Turns out it was J K Rowling, in the drawing room, with a laptop.'

'Oddly enough you're the third person to buy that today!'

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

Virginia could tolerate the Woolf whistles no longer

The evidence destroyed

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

RIP William Shakespeare: To be or not to be...

"I have always depended on the content of strangers."

Mysteries.

Bibliomaniac

"It's a 12 inch chess board - the game's a foot."

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

CSI Wonderland. (Photographer takes a picture of a cracked Humpty Dumpty. Investigators collect evidence from the scene.)

Shakespeare or Bacon or maybe Marlowe.

The Mousetrap, by Agatha Christie

Burglar escapes from tower using Rapunzel's hair.

'Have you got any good 'whodunnits'...?'

"Marlowe filled the crooked gumshoe full of lead. He watched the smoke from his .38 coil in the air as he… mommy’s behind me, isn’t she?"

Crime Writer's Society.

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

"Any clues?"

Melted Snow Man behind police cordon

Major Bagstock is delighted to have that oppertunity

"And what do you see in this inkblot?"

"We have ways of making you talk."

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

Where were you on the night of December 24th between 10pm and 5am