Lip Gloss Aficionado T-Shirts

Lipstick re-apply fee at kissing booth.

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Shampoo.

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"I don't like your application."

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

Kissing the Fish

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

First love.

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

"Do you have anything that can help remove dark circles from under my eyes?"

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

'Stop laughing - Have you never seen a girl putting her make-up on?'

'My acne is worst on the dark side.'

"She won't be long, I'm just putting her face on."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: A Bob Named Sue

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'

"A Leading cosmetics company believes our drilling mud would ake an excellent skincare product."

"Worst case of dry scalp ever!"

Botox sharpei

"She's had a lot of work done."

Modern day mirror.