Linguistic Traveler Gifts

"Tell me, is a single spaghetti a spaghetus or what?"

A Puppet Named Juan

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

I will study my speling words...

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

Punctuation Police

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Someone who knows apostrophes

Why we need poetry. . .

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

'Roget it's fantastic, superb, extraordinary...where on earth did you get the idea?'

'The Questioner'

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

Wok. Don't Wok.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary