Light-hearted Humorists Gifts

"Damn kids and their graffiti."

Bubblewrap Supplies: Just Popped Out

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Daffodil bulbs

Brian the dog#3 - Brian now realised he was NOT man's best friend.

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

Shoe repair

"It's funny 'cos it's true!"

'You're right...these are your hormone pills. Thank goodness we noticed before anything serious happened.'

'Tell me father, why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be hell.'

Surreal Ale Pub.

My Folks, dressed up like Eskimos

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'Vacuums!'

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

Visual gag (the real Mona Lisa behind the scenes).

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

'I believe it's 'feed a fever and starve a lawyer.''

Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 5

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

Born Cynical,,,,

Cupid's Arrow Misses, and Dog Falls In Love with a Man's Leg.

'Hello? Animal control?'

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'