Spirited Humorists Gifts

'Those flashers make no sense to me. The less they have, the more they want to show it.'

"Here we are."

Ten Commandments

Brian the dog#3 - Brian now realised he was NOT man's best friend.

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

"It's funny 'cos it's true!"

'Looks like this part of the beach has been claimed.'

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

"Hey! These are still good!!"

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

My Folks, dressed up like Eskimos

4-Panel: (1) 'Did you read this article on cockroaches?' (2) 'It says scientists have confirmed conditioned reflexes in cockroaches, just like Pavlov's dogs. I don't know if I believe that!' (4) 'What's for dinner?'

"The time has come to reflect and ask ourselves... 'what would Jesus tweet?'"

Newton discovers surrealism

Harbor Hotel: 'Absolutely NO swashbuckling after 10 PM'.

Gender Reveal

Lie detector, "It's a goddam liar bird all right."

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

"NOBODY LISTENS ANYMORE."

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

Liberals' Wishful Thinking about Joe Biden

"The most common adverse vaccine reaction after the first dose is trying to get the second dose."

'This is a first Mr Cowbird. You've contracted mad cow disase and the bird flu!'

Third eye

"It started as an out-of body experience but I forgot the password to get back in."

Robot porn.

Born Cynical,,,,

Online articles are fine, but I miss being annoyed by the fragrance sample cards in print magazines.

'The prisons are full, so I'm sentencing you to marry Rosie O'Donnell.'

Eggs That Were Anagarms In Past Lives -'Unscramble Me'.

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

'I sculpt what I see, Miss Delsey.'