Life Of The Party(not) Gifts

Drink kills.

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

Sally woke up with a headache. This house didn't look familiar. There was a rug burn on her forehead. Three good reasons to quit drinking.

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

The Happiest Hen in Acle

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

'Inside Ralph is a comedienne crying to get out.'

'To make sure I get noticed I always talk in a big bold typeface.'

EXTROVERTS ANONYMOUS

Elderly People

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

Mary Margaret, the best bar Nun.

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

Boozing and Cruising

'Here comes our order.'

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

'It's always the same, isn't it, Dave?... Every time you spot a glitter ball!'

"Don't worry about the economy, dear. We'll always live large."

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

"I, Arthur, being of sound mind, have spent it all on wine, women and song."

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

Amusing patients: Photocopier burns

"I'm getting dangerously close to figuring out what I did last night."

"Bottoms up!"

'I think it's time we left...'

"Is that when you turn the juke box off?"

"Will you please stop trying to appear larger than life?"

"It's just a little device I use to help relieve the anxiety from meeting new people."