Life Advice Lover Gifts

"Always stay rooted, or you'll turn into a tumbleweed..."

Reach for the Star.

"Feel free to take notes."

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'Life is a precious thing, but simply breathing and existing isn't living...the end is inevitable for everything...I'm afraid that time has come for you, dear. I have to pull the plug...'

'Hmmphhhh ... High on Life. Now that's something the government ought to regulate.'

"I'm sorry your wife doesn't understand you, but this is a dry cleaner's."

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

"We can work up to antidepressants, but for now I want to start you on eating a whole jar of cocktail olives over the kitchen sink."

"In this life son, if you want something, you have to hunt for it."

'Well, put a jumper on if you're cold!'

'I'm old, bald and fat, but at least I'm not boring!'

Guru Mom

"Look at it this way - the more birthdays you have, the longer you live!"

A Bug's Life Advice

'Well, if you don't smoke or drink, stop chewing gum!'

Life is about the chase, not the ball. Now go get it!

"Well, it's funny, Sid. Every time I've got onr foot in the grave, something interesting happens, so I pull it back out again!"

Bookstore - Telling others how to improve.

'Any backup plan in case your dream of becoming a YouTube sensation doesn't pan out?'

Be prepared - Don't jump to confusion.

"Don't think of it as being grounded. Think of it as suffering the consequences of your monumental stupidity."

'False alarm! I'm back. It was only a career suicide.'

Months ago, during a special episode of the Ask Sadie show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. Here is an actual reader letter: Dear Sadie, I think you should laugh, love, and go with the flow - and do that with gusto! Don't sweat the small stuff. Kiss all the girls. Boys or whichever you prefer, but remember to laugh. - Bob. Pervert! If we allow laughing, then we'll have to allow cackling. Maybe even guffawing. I refuse to go down

'It's just that simple. So act now and start barking up the 'right' tree.'

Great coaching is about knowing how to give and when to play feedback...

'What doesn't kill you, makes you a burden.'

'Try not to be an idiot.'

"Remember, Timmy. Anything worth doing is worth having somebody do well."