Library Mischief Enthusiast Gifts

"Carrie, I told you that if I returned your library books that late that there would be hell to pay."

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

The Dorrie Decimal System

'It's all original research. I had no assistance when I looked it up on Wikipedia.'

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

Catalogue of little books.

Playing pig

Monster Self-Help

'LOVELY school. But where's the library?' 'What's a library?'

Monosyllabic Crisis Center

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

'Why would all these people line up for a library sale?'

Well, yes, it's a free library, but...

'Oh-oh - it's the old good librarian, bad librarian routine.'

Books 'n' Carrots

Supernatural book - The Unexplained

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

Inbox and outbox for books

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

Building Books.

'Ask not for whom the siren wails...it wails for thee.'

Computer scared of user

"There's probably room for one more."

"Hmm. . . it looks like he was struck on the head with a blunt object. . . If only I could find out what the murder weapon could be. . ."

Works in Progress

Medical Books ( sore subjects ).

'Gee, mom, how DID that happen? Maybe we better Google it!'

"Mr. Crusoe, you have some heft overdue fines."

Mountaineering - Library book shelfs

"I agree, but corporate thinks it'll work."

'Okay, let me see your hands, your feet, and that wily prehensile tail...'

"Wait. We're the pests?"

"Hey, this isn't a medical school diploma. It says you have six books overdue at the libaray!"

Fiction: Facts Used In Politics