Lenten Preparation Gifts

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

What do MD and PHD mean? It means the doctor owes a lot of money in student loans.

'You mean to tell me you forgot where you buried dinner?'

Giving Things Up For Lent.

Member of the Fortune 5 Million

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

Blackjack: free lemonade!

"We're giving up petrol for lent in 2025."

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

'After reviewing my student loans, I wrote my thesis on deficit spending.'

"and what are you giving up for lent, Reverend?" "Religion"

Banks hand out umbrellas in good weather and take them back when it rains.

'Hello, Ma'am. I'm a college graduate selling vacuum cleaners door to door to help pay for the fortune I borrowed to take a course that had nothing to do with selling vacuums... and how are you doing?'

'Considering my student debt, I felt it prudent to specialize in bankruptcy law,'

"Fuel poverty is not the same as being too mean to switch the heating on...."

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

Decisions a Pope makes

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"During Lent we must share with poor children what we have in abundance."

'I have all our acorn storage spots geolocated on my smart phone...'

"I hear that march is coming in like a lineman and out like a lamb...I just wanted to be prepared."

"God, I hate cows."

'That's because they won't let you die until you pay your student loans.'

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"I don't have a set price. I charge what the market will bear."

'I'm knitting a cozy for the house.'

'If it's my food supply for the winter then its different from hoarding.'