Legendary Kitchen Warrior T-Shirts

An anxious knight stares at chef's knives embedded in a stone

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

You're the puff in my pastry!

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

Party time.

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

Boy with bat using toaster to launch bread for him to practise hitting

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

I made you a cake!

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

'The cake timer dinged, Mom, and so did my stomach.'

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

The Inexperienced Cook

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

Will work for Food Network.

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

The legend of Chef Arthur.

A butcher and his apprentice.

Time for pancakes!

'If they rise they're scones. If not they're pancakes.'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

Mrs Jones's fish pie could be smelt for miles around!

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

But I followed the recipe exactly.

Summer Holiday activities the whole family will love.

'You don't appreciate anything I cook!'

Egg Surprise

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."