Legal Terminology Enthusiast Gifts

'What you refer to as looky-looks is classified as insider trading.'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

Violent Crime Statistics

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Lady Justice.

Lawyer's baby first word: whiplash!

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

"You can't quit my bridal fashion business. It says so in the prenup, I man the non-compete agreement!"

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

'You use Romance Languages when wooing your beloved and Hate Languages during the prenup process.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

Baby's first words.

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

Two lawyers in a royal court

Counsel examining witness

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'

Roman Emperor Trump Pointing to El Salvador

Trump Indicted

Dumping The Death Penalty