Legal Loophole Lover Gifts

"Generally accepted accounting practices weren't as generally accepted as I thought."

Loopholes - "That's our legal department."

'Oops, my mistake...Carry on, sir.'

'I'm sorry, sir, but this particular loophole is only for the use of Federal employees.'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"It's what we agreed. I'd do the tax avoidance you'd do the tax evasion."

'Good thing your car was stationary when it hit me.'

'My client is requesting a little more wiggle room,your Honor.'

"How can it be an 'Act of God'? Your policy states you're an atheist."

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Stop and Birch

"#notguilty."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

Intellectual Property

"Stop billing your daughter for reading her bedtime stories!!"

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"They're class action figures."

How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023

Arrogant junior barrister

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

"When I grow up I'm going to be a police officer and follow in my dad's footsteps."

"'Ignorance of the law is no excuse.' Golly! I never heard that one! Did you ever hear that one?"

"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."

'I'm here waiting appeals.'

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."