Legal Attorney Gifts

'Jack Gurkenman, lawyer. If you don't get drunk enough to wet your pants, we can sue the destillery!'

Trial by Media

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"You're fired."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Good boy."

Lynching on social media

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

Flags

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

Campaign for Plain English

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."