Leak Fixator Pillows

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

Lazy plumber.

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

'Yes, I've removed lots of fish-hooks from dogs...'

"We will indeed be facing numerous enraged customers."

"Dad, I'll assemble yours if you assemble mine."

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

'Freezer is on the blink.'

Master Plumber

"I had to improvise"

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

'If we happen to experience deja vu, let's make sure we do some things differently.'

'Damn. The dark is leaking out of the dark room again.'

"Hi, I'm your new neighbour. I work as a maintenance engineer on the Thames Flood Barrier."

'No, you're the plumber, you go and check how bad the leak is.'

"That's really great , but what do you do if you want to remove the nail?"

'It's our last resort.'

'I guess it's official now. No one in this town actually makes anything anymore.'

Stitches.

Despite being dumped by his girlfriend on Christmas Eve, Norman still found a way to pull the crackers despite her absence.

'OK Smith, you can take this back to the Woodwork room now!'

'Oh no, freezer's on the blink again!'

"You gotta admit, it's straight now."