Lazy Lifestyles Gifts

"Do you want fries with that?"

"I AM at my usual position."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

Homo Zapiens

"Fetch me another Sculpin IPA."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'I don't care how comfortable you feel with me. This reels weird for a first date.'

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"Okay, you play dead. 1-2-3 Go!"

Fetch the Boomerang

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

"If yer a potato, I'm a potato."

Eventual Motion Machine

'I'll count to ten thousand: Go and hide...'

The Lackadaisical Dog Walker

"Are you walking the dog? We live on the third floor!"

The Sedentary Dead.

'He isn't use to getting up this early.'

Crumbs of Comfort

'You can't imagine how happy we are to find a vet who makes house calls!'

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

The Stay Put Marshmallow man

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'

"Geoffrey's new year resolution was to give up self-respect."

'I want to be a philosopher Mum: Lots of thinking and no physical work...'

'Why is it I can see what needs doing around here and you can't? . . . I know what cures that. . . 'Chores-ercise'.'

"When you said this was our Forever Home, did you mean we'd be forever home?"

"That's enough exercise for one day."