Lazy Lifestyles Pillows

"Do you want fries with that?"

"I AM at my usual position."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

Homo Zapiens

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"Fetch me another Sculpin IPA."

'I don't care how comfortable you feel with me. This reels weird for a first date.'

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Okay, you play dead. 1-2-3 Go!"

Fetch the Boomerang

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

"If yer a potato, I'm a potato."

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

Eventual Motion Machine

'You can't imagine how happy we are to find a vet who makes house calls!'

'I'll count to ten thousand: Go and hide...'

The Lackadaisical Dog Walker

The Sedentary Dead.

"Are you walking the dog? We live on the third floor!"

'He isn't use to getting up this early.'

Crumbs of Comfort

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

"When you said this was our Forever Home, did you mean we'd be forever home?"

'Why is it I can see what needs doing around here and you can't? . . . I know what cures that. . . 'Chores-ercise'.'

"Geoffrey's new year resolution was to give up self-respect."

The Stay Put Marshmallow man

"That's enough exercise for one day."

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'