Lazy Environmentalists Gifts

'Why are you watching TV with the lights off?'

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

Selfie Stick

"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

The Boys of Indian Summer

The Amazing Adventures of Wondercat.

'I was hoping traffic would ease up after the polar ice cap melted.'

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

"And make sure you give me a paper straw... gotta do my bit for the planet."

'... So one day I thought, hey, why walk all the way out to the mound just to take a pitcher out of the game?'

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'

"We just want a vacation --- we don't want to learn anything."

"I suppose we should clear up those leaves - we are on the third floor."

"I didn't design mankind to be a short-sighted, self-destructive, ravening plague upon their planet. They figured that out all on their own."

'We bought this bolt hole to get away from politicians talking green politics.'

"So what do you plan on accomplishing today?"

'I told you we should have protested against that windfarm'

"Sure, we recycle junk mail - we shove it straight into the neighbour's mail box."

'I fail to note the significance of rising sea levels here on the 39th floor.'

"This material is 80% recycled."

"And our top of the range model is uniquely fuelled by hydro electricity sourced from the clearest glacier melt water filtered through recycled muslin face masks."

'I pose as a concerned citizen, but actually I couldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct.'

Secretary of the Interior Paul Bunyan VI

Snooker Channel.

'Of course, you're probably concerned with mileage and the high gas prices. . .'

GOP Environmental Stink Tank - G.W. Bush National Forest.

Political Parties in Rival Tree Planting Pledges

"I'm walking the sloth. See you all in a week."

"It's his contribution to the environment"

"This S.U.V. sports a flame-retardant, electro-static coating. Eco-activists can't burn it and their pamphlets and bumper stickers slide right off!"

"I wish my father was alive to see how lazy I could really be."