Lazy Day Specialist Gifts

Tear off carpet.

Remedy for the incurable romantic...

"You call them 'hedge trimmers'. I call them 'leverage'. Now mow the lawn!"

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Lazy Octopus

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

Cat and mouse

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

A Golden Non-Retriever

Catatonic

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

Ultra-lazy sloth

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

"Such a refreshing day...I've spent 18 hours between napping and comatose."

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"He's an indoor cat."

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'