Lawn Wizard T-Shirts

Garden Centre - "...she thinks she's getting a mink coat!"

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

Rose Garden

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

'That plant food really works!'

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

D.I.Y

'You can't come in here with that.'

Texturing the Walls

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

The Scottish Lawn

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

"This lawnmower is a real time saver. After pushing it around for an hour, I forget about all the ambitious landscaping plans I thought up over winter."

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Boat Launch'

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

Dog Walker

Garden sprinkler in the form of a classical statue

CONGRATULATIONS On an awesome swim

Man gets round hosepipe ban by showering in the garden

Human males marking territory.

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

"At first I was homesick....now I'll probably be campsick for awhile!"

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

Spring/Summer/Winter