Lawn King Gifts

'Hey Pete...tell me...as a neighbor. Do I have bad grass?'

"He's in charge of mowing... I mainly fertilize."

"I'm going green, too. I'm finally going to mow the lawn."

'That one's for a man with a very large lawn, it's fitted with sat nav.'

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Beginning Yarder.

The very noisy, but enjoyable game of Crowquet.

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"Must get a longer cable."

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I fought the lawn and the lawn won.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

Beware of the Lawn

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

"This lawnmower is a real time saver. After pushing it around for an hour, I forget about all the ambitious landscaping plans I thought up over winter."

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

"We're out of bags."

Garden sprinkler in the form of a classical statue

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

Robotic man mowing the lawn

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

Human males marking territory.

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'