Lawn Decoration Lover Pillows

Tacky lawn ornament hunting. (It's a HUGE sport here in the United States!)

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Beginning Yarder.

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

The Scottish Lawn

Beware of the Lawn

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'Don't forget to put gas in the car and the mower.'

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

"I've found the lawnmower!"

'...so I said to Linda, 'I can't do yard work in the rain!''

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'You know it's too hot to use the sprinkler when the spray turns to steam.'

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"

"I can't go on. All the weeding, mowing, digging, pesticides, and gopher holes really hurts you know. It's just not worth it anymore."