Lawmaker Humorist Gifts

'I just had the greatest idea! -- Let's deregulate ourselves!'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

They're Not Just That Into It

UK/US Free Trade Deal

No-Work Orange

Trump! The Musical

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Oh dear, it's just as we suspected.. they do come from another planet."

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

Spot the Difference - God/Uncle Sam

'We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, except for Hancock... who smells bad...'

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

"Beware of Don"

European Union: Entering a prohibitive tax zone.

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

Trump Will Protect Obama's Legacy

Preliminary Price Tag: $5,000,000,000

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

Uncle Donnie

John F. Kennedy

"You'll note that the card isn't signed so my declaration of undying love isn't legally binding!"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'