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'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

Wal-Mart Ruling

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

Violent Crime Statistics

'Lateral hires are always told we do things differently here.'

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

Lady Justice.

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

Baby's first words.