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I hear your fees are very reasonable...

Trial by Media

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"Not guilty?"

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

Violent Crime Statistics

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

Lady Justice.

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'Do your lawyers have to be here?'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

Baby's first words.

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

Two lawyers in a royal court

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'