Law Enforcement Humorist Pillows

"You have to let me make my own mistakes."

Police car bumper sticker: 'Honk if you want a traffic ticket'.

Hair Spray / CS Gas.

"I guess a driverless patrol car is okay, but can you back me up if we get into trouble?"

It slowly became apparent that the police interpretive dance artist was less effective than the police sketch artist.

"Ahhh! Ha-ha! Exactly what I said when I was pulled over. Dipstick!"

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

Good Cop, Bad Cop Parking Space

"I better approach this one really carefully."

Rollercoaster police chase.

"You were doing 10 knots over the limit."

'Let this guy go. He's working under cover.'

'Doing anything the night you get out?'

'Excuse me, Santa. But, this Lad's wanted for being on the police naughty list.'

'Sorry I'm late Chief, terrible parking!'

Sweet Jailbreak

One lobster has another in hand cuffs.

'Click it or ticket.'

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

"I realise that you're trying to impress your new employers on your first day, dear. But, this is our car!"

For the last time, officer, I'm absolutely, positively sure it was number four.

Stun-gun target practice.

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

Messing Up My Metrics

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

Piñata police line-up.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

'This is just a routine check, sir -- are you a turtle?'

Oh, sorry, I didn

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

"Good job, inspector! Today you made the suspect dance and tomorrow you'll make him sing!"

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

Man sees city sign: 'Loiter in Moderation',