Cop Humorist Pillows

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

"You have to let me make my own mistakes."

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

"Ahhh! Ha-ha! Exactly what I said when I was pulled over. Dipstick!"

The Mafia Goes Green.

Sweet Jailbreak

"Remember, we're an enlightened group. We victimize everyone. No hate crimes for us."

"I'm investigating the theft of a breadcrumb by an ant matching your description."

The Mafia isn't what it used to be...

Stun-gun target practice.

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

'Let this guy go. He's working under cover.'

"We're all metric now..."

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Hello, Mum!'

One lobster has another in hand cuffs.

'I'm always broke because I keep getting MUGGED!'

Rollercoaster police chase.

'Donut shop is down the hall to your right - and I'm not answering any more questions without my lawyer present.'

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

'This is just a routine check, sir -- are you a turtle?'

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

Cuffwear, 2004

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

Police artist drawing a snarling dog while an injured cat desribes him

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

'Just your credit cards. I don't feel safe carrying cash these days.'

Hair Spray / CS Gas.

'Good cop - bad cop is enough. We don't need morally ambiguous cop.'