Laundry Ponderer Gifts

'It must cost a small fortune to dry clean that suit.'

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

"What if it's smarter than us?"

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!!"

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

"Well I think the Real question is..."

Robot Attack in Bath

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

'Does my posterior appear oversized in this?'

'Holding! Number 74 on the offense!... Fifteen years to life in prison...'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'If they don't want me drinking out of the toilet, what's this roll of napkins for?'

"I hate to break it to you, but you weren't his best friend."

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'Can I trust a Doctor whose prescriptions have absolutely no side effects?'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"I want my job back."

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

"They're some kind of robot, perhaps artificially intelligent."

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

Man has drug cabinet labelled 'Safe Drugs' and 'Not Sure Drugs'.

'Wait! Tell me again about the 'excessive gas and oily discharge'?'

Enter Exit - Circle of Life.

'If you don't count your birthday...why should I remember it?'

"These industrial robots don't complain, but they don't show fear, either. I miss the fear."