Laughing Laboratory Technician Gifts

Hazardous substance - ignitable, corrosive, reactive, toxic, real smelly, yucchy.

"I thought you wanted me to change."

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

'A little squirt like Graubart would theorize that the Universe is contracting!'

Frankenfish

Bacterial Cultural Center

'Dude, that big creepy eye is back.'

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

'We've proven without a doubt, that this particle has a negative charge. Unfortunately, an accelerator in Switzerland has proven, without a doubt, that it has a positive charge.'

DNA Xmas.

"I feel it's only fair to warn you, Dr. Thompson, that watching cell division can be quite stimulating!"

'Doctor, one placebo or two with your tea?'

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

'Hey, guys, come over here. I just discovered the telescope.'

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade wine?'

'It took some doing, but I finally traced my roots back to the first amoeba.'

Bacterial Culture

"Blast it, Perkins, not again!"

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

"Whoa, whoa – for all I know you contaminated the sample."

'Are you our new glue-ru?'

"I think we've been wasting out time testing phones on rats. We already know phones are addictive."

"You say genetically modified po-tay-to, I say genetically modified po-tah-to."

'Whine, whine, whine!' You know what your problem is, Baxter? You're not a team player!'

'Here's the problem, sir. This isn't blood in your veins. It's red ink.'

'Yes, Sir, I'm still testing the new truth serum. I slept with your wife.'