Laboratory Laughs Gifts

The Inventor of Scratch and Sniff

"I thought you wanted me to change."

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

'A little squirt like Graubart would theorize that the Universe is contracting!'

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

Frankenfish

Bacterial Cultural Center

'Dude, that big creepy eye is back.'

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

'We've proven without a doubt, that this particle has a negative charge. Unfortunately, an accelerator in Switzerland has proven, without a doubt, that it has a positive charge.'

DNA Xmas.

'Doctor, one placebo or two with your tea?'

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"I feel it's only fair to warn you, Dr. Thompson, that watching cell division can be quite stimulating!"

'It took some doing, but I finally traced my roots back to the first amoeba.'

'Kleinzweck has a theory that the strong nuclear force is actually tiny rolls of duct tape.'

Bacterial Culture

"Blast it, Perkins, not again!"

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

'Are you our new glue-ru?'

"Whoa, whoa – for all I know you contaminated the sample."

"I think we've been wasting out time testing phones on rats. We already know phones are addictive."

"You say genetically modified po-tay-to, I say genetically modified po-tah-to."

"The doctor will see you now."

Hazardous substance - ignitable, corrosive, reactive, toxic, real smelly, yucchy.

'Whine, whine, whine!' You know what your problem is, Baxter? You're not a team player!'