Laugh Manufacturer Gifts

Precious comedy writers.

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Snowprov

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

Two circus clowns see each other dressed for a costume party.

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

'I missed work due to a rib injury from belly-laughing at your jokes.'

"I don't know whether to be mad that you had water this whole time or impressed with your commitment to the joke."

'You have an enlarged funny bone.'

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

'Your Chef's Surprise, sir -- a sauteed whoopee cushion.'

King and Jester

"It's good news, Mrs Fenton - Your laughter is no longer infectious!"

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

Hypnotoon

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

Medical Cabinet

"Women like funny men, but you can't go on a date dressed like that!"

"Target in range. Ready... hug."

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'

"You know you're getting old when you need a hearing aid to hear your bones creak."

"Ok, ok, how's everyone feeling tonight besides a thousand dollars poorer?"

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

"You came up in therapy today."