Lather Lover Pillows

'I like doing shampoos, it gets your hands clean.'

Beauty School Drop Outs

"Actually, make that a double cream."

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

The Missing Sock Returns

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

Archimedes statue with a lever

'Hey! Hey! You need a trout stamp! Where's your trout stamp?!'

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Your reflexes are still good!'

Crab with a clown face.

"This is so fun - I've been wagging my tail so much my cheeks hurt!"

Clown waits for 'Happy Hour' to begin.

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

'The girls must be feeling better...'

'Since laughter is the best medicine, I have a joke, Hee, Hee, Haw,Ha!...that could simply wipe out your Infectious Mononucleosis!'

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

Stephen Fry

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

'Caw blimey!'

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"This is your new solar powered dryer?"

Apothecary. Tell us what ails you. We'll concoct a chemical mix to dissolve in water which will fix you. Every problem has solution!

Homo Zapiens

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

That's not what I meant when I suggested you get an exercise machine.

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."