Latecomer Extraordinaire Gifts

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"Sorry I'm late, Ms. Dow. The electricity went off last night and we didn't wake up 'til 12:00 12:00 12:00 12:00..."

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

Help wanted!...Ace Software, Inc...Video Game Tournament...Top 5 players get hired!

Teenage Angst.

"Race you to the corner! Last one there is an expired egg substitute!"

'Pause your games, kids! There's a high fly ball deep to center field!'

Counsel for the prosecution makes its closing argument in mime court.

The inventor of the clock realizes his mistake

'Never thought I'd enjoy a cricket match so much.'

'Fuel efficiency? I get about three times around the block on a peanut butter sandwich.'

The Little Top.

"The transcranial magnetic stimulation headband lets me feel my victims' suffering."

"I kind of did my maths homework... I worked out that if I was going to watch TV and play a video game, I wouldn't have time to do any homework."

'Dude, I think your memory card is full.'

"If they're advanced enough to come all the way here, I'm sure they have the technology to charge our phones."

'And you honey, how was your day at the PlayStation?'

"April Fool's on her!"

Roughing it in the Great Outdoors.

In need of a wash...

'I'm not sure I like Billy playing video games so much!'

'And over here is where I mount the hunting video games I've completed!'

'It's a realistic sports game! The object is to sign the biggest endorsement contract.'

"I know what's going on here - you just want to enrich my microbiome."

"I just finished high school and college online. Now can I play my video game?"

"Oh, quit whining, Dave, and shake it off. Pain is just weakness leaving the body!"

Trans Rights are Human Rights

'Of course this game is educational; how else could I prepare for a zombie apocalypse.'

'He's got a really big sound.'

"Can you use some quieter software, something without all those bells and whistles?"

Impressive resume.

'He was pretending to be playing for Manchester United when he collapsed with exhaustion.'

'He wants to know if you brought Him an X-Box?'