Lap Aficionado Gifts

Endurance

"Portrait of a Lady"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

Pete Sampras

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

Rap music

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

Yo! Emmett Kelly raps! (with ringmaster flash)

“Can I have her now? Hey! My turn.”

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

The Harper Plays Cricket.

Joey Barton's red card wins Premiership League for Manchester City.

Cristiano Ronaldo

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

'It doesn't show it on this map....'

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

Lost

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois

Football.

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

Fox hunting.

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

'It took some doing, but we got your name on!'

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

National Park Map

Gangsta wrap.

'I'm dreading the World Cup . . .'

Soccer player being showered with toilet roles and a toilet.

"Would you like something by an over promoted high-price athlete or a nobody from Jersey?"