Language Guru Gifts

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'I see you have got the baking bug Professor.'

''Hunting season is just around the corner' is only a figure of speech, Ben.'

A Puppet Named Juan

Polly txt speak

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

Thru versus Through Traffic

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Punctuation Police

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Create some buzz!

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'The Questioner'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"I try to write a little bit every day."

Dating an English Major

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

'Curious how all four previous employers spelt 'exceptional' with just an 'x'.'

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'