Lab Coat Aspirant Gifts

'I don't know what happened! All I did was say I went into medicine for the money!'

Scientists are sexy

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

'If we were in the Renaissance, we'd be painting nativity scenes right now.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Plasma Ball

'Remove the fur and claws and these genetically engineered apples taste just fine.'

'Quickly boy, tell me which test tube you drank from?!'

Plasma Ball

"They're harmless when they're alone, but get a bunch of them together with a research grant and watch out."

"Although your discovery is very important, the consensus is that your article about it lacked suspense, and was completely devoid of humor."

Ann was shocked and awed when the General kissed her after her presentation and she wondered if he'd heard a word she'd said.

"Maybe we should have tried it on the rats first."

'I turn the other cheek more now that Botox has made it wrinkle-free.'

Successful Baseball Teams Rely on a Good Pharm System.

Identifying Scientists by their Lab Coats.

"Great. First our funding ran out, now the rat."

Animal Engineering Lab.

"I just love the reactions I get every day when I come to work."

"If my calculations are correct, we'll finally have the answer to looking cute in the winter!"

"Okay, I'm not the fastest gun in the west. . . but I am the fastest gun in my immediate family!"

Under strict laboratory conditions extensive research proves that, despite being watched, pots do eventually boil.

'The results are far from conclusive, but it does cause cancer in humans.'

Genetic Engineering 'N Things

'If we could just add one more gene to make the skeptical customer trust us.'

'I feel much better. I think the cheese treatments must be working.'

Recombinant DNA Lab.

'I'm testing whether the little blue pill. Will speed up the reproduction process of these organisms.'

"...then - and here's the funny part - I add the potassium sulfate..."

"You've just proven that your job doesn't exist."

'Report cards, folks - and they have to be signed by your high school chemistry teachers.'

'If that's true, if you've really done it, I can say unequivocally, that is indeed...Nothing to sneeze at!'

'Just as I thought...made in Alaska!'