Kung Fu Aficionado Gifts

Don't Waste A Moment! Put Down That Magazine And Get Fit While You Sit!

Overjumpers

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

Black Belt/Yellow Belt/Green Belt/No Belt.

'Remember me?'

'You may now kick the bride.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

Mod Kwan Doh

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Old Karate Master

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

'Somebody keeps snapping all the stud boards in half. Anybody know anything about this?'

Mitch Lee, kung-fondue master.

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"Is this something that could hold till Monday, Chris?"

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

'Your Thai-chi-chicken Sir.'

Cluck Norris in...LAYED in ACTION!

'Elroy had an unfortunate knack for picking fights with the wrong people'

Martial Arts

"Use your words, Jefferson! Not a roundhouse to the face!"

"Watch out for Donlan. He came back from Tokyo with a black belt in collective bargaining."

"Three more classes and I get my belt."

"And what if the assailant comes at you from inside your own head."

"Can you spare a few bricks ... I'm learning Karate."

'I'm a simple man really beneath the code words and the black ops and the multitude of fake passports.'

'What did I tell you about getting caught on the ropes?'

'I can say 'no' in five different languages: English, Spanish, German, Russian and Karate.'

Ninja.