Knowledge Diggers Gifts

"If you have any more archaeology questions, I'm sure we can dig up the answer."

'It's all original research. I had no assistance when I looked it up on Wikipedia.'

Continuing education.

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

Inside One's Memory Bank

Blue Stockings

Computer: 'There are some things it is better not to know.'

"Why can't you just dig things up like normal dogs?"

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"Life after death"

Wikipedia...

'Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study.'

"And you need to know this why?"

"I might have to go to school forever because the more I know the more I know I don't know."

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"The bones were bad enough, but this is just ridiculous."

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

"No, wisdom is not hereditary, it's something you need to earn yourself..."

'What makes you think you know so much?' - 'Your questions.'

Weapens of Mass Instruction

'Do either of you fancy joining our pub quiz team?'

'Are you sure this is where you buried your Daddy?'

''Science is nothing but trained and organized common sense' Thomas Huxley, 1825-1895.'

Capital

"I'm referring you to a specialist."

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

"On the contrary. I think the Carribbean countries have a great many education practices that are worth studying."

"I'm here to gets the gold"

'Curiosity'

"OK, who can tell me why it's important to know stuff."

'Well, it's official. The entire catalogue has to be dumbed down again!'

You could have saved yourself a lot of time my reading my syndicated advice column.

Community College. History's a lot more fun if you think of it as gossip.