Knee Replacement Surgery Gifts

'He was a lifelong knee-jerk liberal until he got knee replacement surgery.'

"Gary had a knee replacement. He replaced it with a cup holder."

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

Gary turns 40.

"Uh Ooh... Another tsunami hits the Ross Ice shelf!

"Technically, it's a mammal."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"See what happens when you go swimming after eating!"

"I'd like to have my teeth scrimshawed without being, you know, harpooned."

Tunnel of Whale Guts

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."

Free Radicals.

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

'My daughter read on the internet about a hip replacement with free built-in MP3 player,'

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

"I'm afraid, Mr. Cottontail, that all that hopping down the bunny trail has taken a toll on your hips."

'Look honey! I can touch my knees!'

'Phoor...watch these sperm whales at it...ah...yes..yes...'

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

Is it a book? A film? A TV show? How do you mime a podcast?

'You're going to need a hip-hoperation.'

"The interest rate can't go any lower, so if necessary, we'll have to go back to pounds of flesh."

'This is definitely not your typical beaching.'

'I just read 'Moby Dick'...do you have anymore 'whale hate' literature?'

"This Save the Whales Number has got to go, pet."

'This is a simple case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.'

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

'Keep pushing, guys. Here comes the ship that ran over Ernie last night.'

'If this works, don't forget to thank her for the kidney.'

Giant sandwich bags.

'What keeps the gray whales awake during their 12,000 mile long migration.' A whale at a coffee stand says, 'Did you put the lids on tight on those 25,000 cups of coffee to go?'

"Can you send me a detailed list of knee exercises I could do at home but won't because I have no discipline."

'. . . and in the twinkling of an eyes, the festive feeding frenzy began.'