Kitchen Re-inventor T-Shirts

'My marriage is at the stage where we may re-model the kitchen - again!'

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

'Can you tell me how my new kitchen is coming along?'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

"Well..I think the old Thermograph machine I rescued from work goes a treat with our kitchen units."

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

Cook in the cookery section.

'Harry won't even build me a new kitchen.'

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

A Matryoshka dolls putting an oven in an oven

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

"How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?"

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

Swiss Army Stove.

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"Honey, look-those are the tiles I was thinking about for the kitchen."

I Bake. Deal with it.

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

'It's lovely. Have you actually built a flat-pack kitchen before?'

"I think Tia Carmen has found her dream pot."

'Of course, the self-cleaning models tend to cost a little more.'

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

Come to think of it...I could do with a showcase kitchen as it goes...