Kitchen Kings And Queens T-Shirts

'Wow, that really was concentrated dish soap.'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

Counting ribs

Domestic Goddess.

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

Soup of the month.

"That's it. We’re toast."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"Take me to your Larder!"

Too much cilantro

Baker Romance

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

Salt and Pepper

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

The Perfect Foil

Sweet surprise.

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

An Advance Visit From The Three Wise Men

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

"So are you can't cook or won't cook?"

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

'Anybody for breakfast?'

Will work for Food Network.

The secret lives of household things.

"If they don't show up soon I'll have to admit I forgot to invite them."

Entertainment systems

'My mom bakes from scratch -- she's a full-service mom.'