Kitchen Improvisor Pillows

'Because I couldn't find the potato masher, that's why!'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Tool Box

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

Conservation Area

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

"I'd like to toast our guests."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

The Day Dreamer.

'Harry won't even build me a new kitchen.'

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

I'm sorry Miss, but your artistic license has expired.

Man's best friend

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

'Please excuse the mess. The interior decorators are in.'

"When you get a minute, I have some kitchen shelves you can put up."

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

'Any day now I'll fix the roof.'