Kitchen Chaos Manager T-Shirts

"Could Doctor see him now-I have the dinner to cook."

"I enjoy root vegetables as much as anyone, but enough is enough."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

Kitchen Tetris

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

Man's cooking explodes.

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

How to correctly estimate cooking time

Ten out of ten for effort...

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

'Anthony! And all over my new carpet! Bad cat! Bad cat!'

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Chef De Party.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'Do you want toast with that?'

Disaster in the kitchen.

Cooking

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

Cook au vin

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'